The ego is a tricky thing. Based on what I've personally experienced, and what I've observed, one of its favorite tricks is to covertly use spirituality to perpetuate its agenda of separateness.
One common phenomenon is the idea that we are astrologically, numerologically, (or related to the Mayan calendar) "going through an intense time." This gives those who follow this idea an opportunity to rationalize avoiding the challenges they are experiencing currently (which are usually relational in nature). In other words, you might "feel bad" and attribute this to some "phase" we are collectively within instead of dealing directly with your life. If you look around, you'll find that no period in history has not been described by some "expert" as an intense time, so don't wait for a "peaceful time on the planet" to confront your personal challenges.
A related idea which uses the concept of time for the ego's agenda is that "salvation is coming soon." The most common version of this idea relates to the idea that at some point in the near future, such as 2012, there will be a global awakening, and things will magically become much easier. This has taken various forms over time, and the dates of salvation are always being "pushed back" when prior dates pass us by (for example, many thought that the year 2000 would bring some kind of planetary awakening, but it didn't, because awakening occurs in individuals, and the 7 billion inhabitants of Earth are in a wide spectrum of places on their personal journey).
Lastly, there is the idea of looking to "bliss out" which is a natural high that is sustained over a long period of time. Rarely, there are those who authentically experience this, such as Eckhart Tolle did after many years of great personal suffering. After attaining enlightenment, it was hard for Tolle to function in the world in a traditional sense, so he decided to just be still and absorb the bliss...a state that many of us would like to experience. If such bliss emerges within you, go with it. However, if you are trying very hard to bliss out in order to avoid your life (again, it is typically relational issues that the ego wants to avoid) then this could be a form of "spiritual escapism" that will probably not work for very long. The situations in your life will typically only improve when you deal with them directly, and without denial.
I believe that our relationships are extremely important on a spiritual level, and that many seekers are (usually unconsciously) looking for any answer that would allow them to not deal with their relationships, because of fear of conflict or rejection. I've witnessed many people who identify as spiritual but don't understand that spiritual communication requires reciprocity.
If someone asks you a question, a spiritual response requires answering it, or perhaps saying "I don't feel comfortable answering that" or "I need some time to think about that." The amount of nonreciprocal communication going on all over the web is something that wouldn't occur in person or even over the phone, but on the Internet people often avoid questions or sometimes don't reply at all to a "friend's" contact. This doesn't reflect the realm of spirit which is a true web of contact.
Some may rationalize to themselves, "I'm too busy finding my bliss!" but true bliss that will spread across the planet requires impeccable communication skills. If you don't have time for a new friendship, stop accepting new friends into your social network. In many cases, it may be best to end relationships that no longer serve your growth so that you may open up more space in your life for new contact.
In the spiritual realm, interconnected communication "just is." As we look around in the physical world for answers that provide peace, we often miss what is right in front of us: the people we consider to be part of our commune-ity. So here are some suggestions for improving communication with the people you are choosing to include as a part of your life:
(1.) If you're in a problematic relationship (be it romantic, or otherwise), try to heal it directly. If it can't be healed, leave it. Don't drag yourself and the other person down energetically by avoiding its challenges while hoping for meditation, yoga, or other "spiritual answers" to bring you peace.
(2.) Deal with unfinished business in your family of origin. If you have unresolved issues with your family and are "tiptoeing" around them by saying you're busy or using some other technique of avoidance, drop the games. It doesn't matter how much time you spent with people in the past, or what they used to mean to you. If you can't work through unfinished business directly, the relationship isn't supporting your growth (or their growth).
(3.) If someone contacts you, respond. If you can't reply within a day or two, let that person know when you expect that you'll be able to reply. If that person makes an emotional statement, or any statement that you sense is important to them, don't ignore it. If that person asks a question, answer it, or explain why you don't feel comfortable answering it at this time. Don't blow off human contact if you want to have an authentic connection. And if you don't want to have a connection with someone, don't be afraid to end that relationship. It doesn't make you a bad person to initiate change. Life is always changing, and if all relationships were eternal we'd soon have absolutely no time for new connections.
(4.) In the era of the Internet we have many opportunities for meeting people on a daily basis. Yet we have to realistically assess how much contact we can have in our life if we don't want to live in a constant state of feeling overwhelmed by human contact. This means setting and reassessing our boundaries as an ongoing part of our social existence. Don't look for new contact if you don't have time for it. Don't accept friend requests on social sites if you don't even have time to reply to an introductory note from your new "friend." It may feel good to the ego to have "lots of friends" but it is meaningless and empty if you don't have time for contact with a thousand people. Of course, some people will want to "boost their numbers" to promote themselves and/or their business, but this should never be confused with human contact or friendship.
(5.) The philosopher Martin Buber spoke of "I-Thou" relationships vs. "I-It" relationships. He used these terms to describe the way people interact with each other. "I-Thou" means using contact and presence while communicating with another human being, while "I-It" means a superficial interaction that treats the other like an object. In the era of the web it has become easier than ever to treat people as an "It" instead of engaging in the sacred interaction of "I-Thou." If you feel that you're too busy to keep up with everyone in your life, it may be time to make some changes. The world is set up with "instructions" on how to end romantic relationships, but many people have no idea how to end friendships or relationships with family members. However, it simply requires direct communication of how you are feeling. Be honest with yourself about who makes you feel like a "Thou" and who makes you feel like an "It." Stop putting energy towards your It-interactions and invest in the Thou-relationships if you truly want to feel better and help the spiritual evolution of humanity.
Peace,
Chris
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One common phenomenon is the idea that we are astrologically, numerologically, (or related to the Mayan calendar) "going through an intense time." This gives those who follow this idea an opportunity to rationalize avoiding the challenges they are experiencing currently (which are usually relational in nature). In other words, you might "feel bad" and attribute this to some "phase" we are collectively within instead of dealing directly with your life. If you look around, you'll find that no period in history has not been described by some "expert" as an intense time, so don't wait for a "peaceful time on the planet" to confront your personal challenges.
A related idea which uses the concept of time for the ego's agenda is that "salvation is coming soon." The most common version of this idea relates to the idea that at some point in the near future, such as 2012, there will be a global awakening, and things will magically become much easier. This has taken various forms over time, and the dates of salvation are always being "pushed back" when prior dates pass us by (for example, many thought that the year 2000 would bring some kind of planetary awakening, but it didn't, because awakening occurs in individuals, and the 7 billion inhabitants of Earth are in a wide spectrum of places on their personal journey).
Lastly, there is the idea of looking to "bliss out" which is a natural high that is sustained over a long period of time. Rarely, there are those who authentically experience this, such as Eckhart Tolle did after many years of great personal suffering. After attaining enlightenment, it was hard for Tolle to function in the world in a traditional sense, so he decided to just be still and absorb the bliss...a state that many of us would like to experience. If such bliss emerges within you, go with it. However, if you are trying very hard to bliss out in order to avoid your life (again, it is typically relational issues that the ego wants to avoid) then this could be a form of "spiritual escapism" that will probably not work for very long. The situations in your life will typically only improve when you deal with them directly, and without denial.
I believe that our relationships are extremely important on a spiritual level, and that many seekers are (usually unconsciously) looking for any answer that would allow them to not deal with their relationships, because of fear of conflict or rejection. I've witnessed many people who identify as spiritual but don't understand that spiritual communication requires reciprocity.
If someone asks you a question, a spiritual response requires answering it, or perhaps saying "I don't feel comfortable answering that" or "I need some time to think about that." The amount of nonreciprocal communication going on all over the web is something that wouldn't occur in person or even over the phone, but on the Internet people often avoid questions or sometimes don't reply at all to a "friend's" contact. This doesn't reflect the realm of spirit which is a true web of contact.
Some may rationalize to themselves, "I'm too busy finding my bliss!" but true bliss that will spread across the planet requires impeccable communication skills. If you don't have time for a new friendship, stop accepting new friends into your social network. In many cases, it may be best to end relationships that no longer serve your growth so that you may open up more space in your life for new contact.
In the spiritual realm, interconnected communication "just is." As we look around in the physical world for answers that provide peace, we often miss what is right in front of us: the people we consider to be part of our commune-ity. So here are some suggestions for improving communication with the people you are choosing to include as a part of your life:
(1.) If you're in a problematic relationship (be it romantic, or otherwise), try to heal it directly. If it can't be healed, leave it. Don't drag yourself and the other person down energetically by avoiding its challenges while hoping for meditation, yoga, or other "spiritual answers" to bring you peace.
(2.) Deal with unfinished business in your family of origin. If you have unresolved issues with your family and are "tiptoeing" around them by saying you're busy or using some other technique of avoidance, drop the games. It doesn't matter how much time you spent with people in the past, or what they used to mean to you. If you can't work through unfinished business directly, the relationship isn't supporting your growth (or their growth).
(3.) If someone contacts you, respond. If you can't reply within a day or two, let that person know when you expect that you'll be able to reply. If that person makes an emotional statement, or any statement that you sense is important to them, don't ignore it. If that person asks a question, answer it, or explain why you don't feel comfortable answering it at this time. Don't blow off human contact if you want to have an authentic connection. And if you don't want to have a connection with someone, don't be afraid to end that relationship. It doesn't make you a bad person to initiate change. Life is always changing, and if all relationships were eternal we'd soon have absolutely no time for new connections.
(4.) In the era of the Internet we have many opportunities for meeting people on a daily basis. Yet we have to realistically assess how much contact we can have in our life if we don't want to live in a constant state of feeling overwhelmed by human contact. This means setting and reassessing our boundaries as an ongoing part of our social existence. Don't look for new contact if you don't have time for it. Don't accept friend requests on social sites if you don't even have time to reply to an introductory note from your new "friend." It may feel good to the ego to have "lots of friends" but it is meaningless and empty if you don't have time for contact with a thousand people. Of course, some people will want to "boost their numbers" to promote themselves and/or their business, but this should never be confused with human contact or friendship.
(5.) The philosopher Martin Buber spoke of "I-Thou" relationships vs. "I-It" relationships. He used these terms to describe the way people interact with each other. "I-Thou" means using contact and presence while communicating with another human being, while "I-It" means a superficial interaction that treats the other like an object. In the era of the web it has become easier than ever to treat people as an "It" instead of engaging in the sacred interaction of "I-Thou." If you feel that you're too busy to keep up with everyone in your life, it may be time to make some changes. The world is set up with "instructions" on how to end romantic relationships, but many people have no idea how to end friendships or relationships with family members. However, it simply requires direct communication of how you are feeling. Be honest with yourself about who makes you feel like a "Thou" and who makes you feel like an "It." Stop putting energy towards your It-interactions and invest in the Thou-relationships if you truly want to feel better and help the spiritual evolution of humanity.
Peace,
Chris
Get 5 Free Minutes ~ Live Psychic and Tarot Readings
Get 10 Minutes for $1.99 ~ Live Psychic and Tarot Readers
This blogger is supported by ethical reading sites which offer live online psychic readings, tarot readers and astrology.
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