Saturday, November 27, 2010

The Importance of Breathing...All The Time

I was reflecting tonight on why anxiety is associated with not breathing. Why do we "hold our breath" when in a tense situation? It occurred to me that when we were living lives threatened by stalking animals, our breathing could give us away. So we held our breath until danger passed.

I recently noticed that while playing the video game "Civilization Revolution" I held my breath when an important battle ensued. It was just a game, but my body was responding as if I might be noticed and attacked by a lion. It's amazing that this pattern of "breath holding" continues into contemporary living.

I would like to overcome this pattern. I would like to breath comfortably...all the time. The only time I would like my breath to be irregular is if I'm purposely doing connected breathwork to release tension. I have the feeling that if I were breathing regularly all the time I would not require as much connected breathwork as that technique seems to be a release of pent up tension.

When I first started having regular panic attacks around 1994, I had a hard time getting properly diagnosed. Eventually I ended up in a panic disorder group, and from a medical perspective the facilitator said that the two things that trigger a panic attack are a build up of either carbon dioxide or lactic acid. In other words, not breathing well, or holding tension in your muscles.

So to live without panic one must simply keep breathing, and relax. It sounds easy, but we are conditioned to be "on the lookout" for danger. What we consider dangerous now is different than our early ancestors. We now worry about things like social status, gossip, and money. Gone are the threats of wild animals. They have been replaced by fears related to how we are perceived by others and other minutia.

There is a reciprocal relationship between breathing and well-being. When we feel good, we breathe well. When we breathe well, we feel better. So consciousness of how we are breathing is one of the simplest ways to increase our enjoyment of life.

As a practice, I will commit to being more conscious of my breathing, and make sure that I continue to breathe easily. There are no threats in my life except what my ego conjures up to keep me in fear. I'm going to commit to staying relaxed, and breathing easily because I prefer to live a peaceful, enjoyable existence.

Peace,
Chris

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Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Healing Without Victim Consciousness

It is tempting to become a victim when we are "wronged" by another, but I find it useful to reflect on why it is that something occurred, and how it relates to my own past behavior. For example, if someone lies to me, I ask myself, "Who have I deceived."

Instead of identifying as a victim of another person, I try to right the wrongs of my past, and apologize to those I've deceived. This seems to resolve karma and help heal current pains.

Of course, there may still be a need for sadness and anger as one goes through the grief process. Nevertheless, seeing how we may have created a negative experience as a result of our own choices is ultimately a more empowering way to experience life than feeling like a victim of random circumstances.

The issue of past life actions complicates things somewhat, but we can discern from our current life challenges what we may have brought into this life. I find that most of my difficulties make sense within the context of my actions in this life, but I do believe I brought some unfinished business in this world. It makes sense if one does harm to another then dies before resolving their karma, they are going to have challenges in the next life that help create empathy.

Ultimately, it is all about building empathy. When we cross another person's boundaries, we understand on a visceral level why that it is a poor choice when we have our own boundaries crossed later on.

Perhaps when we have resolved our karma there is no longer a need for disease, deterioration, or even death? Perhaps we can only find inner peace when we have taken responsibility for all of our actions, and have come to clarity about why we have experienced various challenges in this life. Until then, the lessons keep coming.

Peace,
Chris

Peace,
Chris

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Guilt: The EndGame

It seems to me that during the process of cleaning up one's karma (apologizing, making amends for one's pre-conscious time of life) it can feel kind of like a death.

I've come to believe that the ego is a trickster, and one of its most sneaky moves is to try to convince us that at any moment we may be dying or going crazy.

I've found that as I've been taking ownership of my past behavior and clearing up unfinished business, there have been times where I've felt that I may be dying. I feel "strange" and don't know what to make of it.

However, I feel that it's really just something leaving me body...a heavy energy letting go of its grip as guilt is released. When there is a shift in how I feel, the first thing my ego does is convince me I'm losing my mind, or losing my life.

But I'm not losing either. I'm just losing the burden of guilt...and moving forward with less heaviness, and fewer self-defeating choices.

Peace,
Chris

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