I'm finding that what nourishes me is interacting with people who reciprocate in a complete and timely manner. It can lower my esteem to reach out to someone who takes a week or more to reply, or does not answer questions I ask, or respond to things I share.
Some people are busier than others, and that is something I must keep in mind since I have the time to respond within a day. However, some people are avoidant. It seems as though certain topics are triggering to them, so they use avoidance to cope with their triggers. Ultimately if people become less triggered (have resolved their internal conflicts) then they become more capable of reciprocating.
Since I grew up with a mother who was uncomfortable with emotional reciprocation, and a father who was relatively disinterested in my life (and triggered by my interest in computers since he fought against computers as they were integrated into his field of mechanical engineering) I have received mirroring that states that I don't matter. If I believe in this mirroring, I will continue to reach out to be seen by those who don't reciprocate, which feels bad since it reinforces feelings of unimportance.
It seems that denial can arise when I look at this dynamic because it sometimes may mean that I am left with myself. However, there is an individual form of reciprocity which I'm still learning about. It is about the reciprocity between my actions and my guidance. If I receive guidance, for example, about setting a boundary with someone, but I don't do it...this creates a lack of reciprocity which creates stagnation. If I follow my guidance by taking action where needed, and aligning my behavior with what I know works, then I receive more guidance. Spirit wants to come into this world, and so taking appropriate action helps the material world become similar to the world of spirit. If this is what we are here to do, then it is important to not resist guidance, because it will lead to feeling "stuck."
Metaphoriclly, reciprocity is like the exchange of water between the sky and the ground. If the clouds withheld, the ground would become too dry. If the water on the ground didn't evaporate, it wouldn't move around. Similarly, when we share, information moves around and human evolution can occur.
I would like all of my relationships to have this kind of symbiosis. However, I must recognize as a teacher/healer that people do withhold, are triggered, and sometimes blocked. Therefore, I must turn to another metaphor to stay healthy: The metaphor of the star. The star doesn't ask for anything from any planets or asteroids which orbit around it. The star gives from within, and continues to gives without expectations.
In our world we call call people "stars" when they entertain us...musicians and actors, mostly. However, anyone who watches or reads biographies can see how many "stars" are looking for reciprocity...they are looking to be filled up by attention, awards, and acclaim. This is another form of reciprocity, and typically not a healthy one...because the "fans" wish they were "stars" and the "stars" depend upon the fans for a sense of self.
The true stars of this world are spiritual teachers who share without need, give without expectation. They may have a cloud/ground relationship with others who are capable of giving and receiving, but if they are happy they don't confuse their role as a sun with their role in a cloud/ground relationship. Perhaps they have no cloud/ground relationship, such as when Eckhart Tolle lived in a park for two years. He was a sun, and he was at peace.
If we feel drawn to spiritual teaching then it is important to know when we are called upon to be a sun, and when we are in a reciprocting relationship that gives us the quenching shared water we desire. If we can transcend the need for water, we are connected to our own source...but as we work on healing our emotional wounds, we may find it helpful to seek reciprocity along our journey.
There are some who block out all light. These people are not worth our time as a sun. They are surrounded by a thick layer of volcanic ash that blocks out any warmth, and only when the ash clears can they receive. They can be like "black holes" that can suck away the energy of the star. Even the greatest teachers/healers can't help them until they are ready.
There are also those who are like planets, who feel the warmth from the star they orbit. They have yet to realize their own star-like qualities, so they receive warmth (in the form of insight) from the star. Eventually, with work, planets can become stars, and warm others who need it.
So the key is to shine upon those who benefit from the warmth, and to exchange the water of emotional vulnerability with those who are invested in giving and receiving. To do otherwise is an underutilization of our energy, and will not contribute to our personal evolution, or the evolution of humanity.
Peace,
Chris
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Some people are busier than others, and that is something I must keep in mind since I have the time to respond within a day. However, some people are avoidant. It seems as though certain topics are triggering to them, so they use avoidance to cope with their triggers. Ultimately if people become less triggered (have resolved their internal conflicts) then they become more capable of reciprocating.
Since I grew up with a mother who was uncomfortable with emotional reciprocation, and a father who was relatively disinterested in my life (and triggered by my interest in computers since he fought against computers as they were integrated into his field of mechanical engineering) I have received mirroring that states that I don't matter. If I believe in this mirroring, I will continue to reach out to be seen by those who don't reciprocate, which feels bad since it reinforces feelings of unimportance.
It seems that denial can arise when I look at this dynamic because it sometimes may mean that I am left with myself. However, there is an individual form of reciprocity which I'm still learning about. It is about the reciprocity between my actions and my guidance. If I receive guidance, for example, about setting a boundary with someone, but I don't do it...this creates a lack of reciprocity which creates stagnation. If I follow my guidance by taking action where needed, and aligning my behavior with what I know works, then I receive more guidance. Spirit wants to come into this world, and so taking appropriate action helps the material world become similar to the world of spirit. If this is what we are here to do, then it is important to not resist guidance, because it will lead to feeling "stuck."
Metaphoriclly, reciprocity is like the exchange of water between the sky and the ground. If the clouds withheld, the ground would become too dry. If the water on the ground didn't evaporate, it wouldn't move around. Similarly, when we share, information moves around and human evolution can occur.
I would like all of my relationships to have this kind of symbiosis. However, I must recognize as a teacher/healer that people do withhold, are triggered, and sometimes blocked. Therefore, I must turn to another metaphor to stay healthy: The metaphor of the star. The star doesn't ask for anything from any planets or asteroids which orbit around it. The star gives from within, and continues to gives without expectations.
In our world we call call people "stars" when they entertain us...musicians and actors, mostly. However, anyone who watches or reads biographies can see how many "stars" are looking for reciprocity...they are looking to be filled up by attention, awards, and acclaim. This is another form of reciprocity, and typically not a healthy one...because the "fans" wish they were "stars" and the "stars" depend upon the fans for a sense of self.
The true stars of this world are spiritual teachers who share without need, give without expectation. They may have a cloud/ground relationship with others who are capable of giving and receiving, but if they are happy they don't confuse their role as a sun with their role in a cloud/ground relationship. Perhaps they have no cloud/ground relationship, such as when Eckhart Tolle lived in a park for two years. He was a sun, and he was at peace.
If we feel drawn to spiritual teaching then it is important to know when we are called upon to be a sun, and when we are in a reciprocting relationship that gives us the quenching shared water we desire. If we can transcend the need for water, we are connected to our own source...but as we work on healing our emotional wounds, we may find it helpful to seek reciprocity along our journey.
There are some who block out all light. These people are not worth our time as a sun. They are surrounded by a thick layer of volcanic ash that blocks out any warmth, and only when the ash clears can they receive. They can be like "black holes" that can suck away the energy of the star. Even the greatest teachers/healers can't help them until they are ready.
There are also those who are like planets, who feel the warmth from the star they orbit. They have yet to realize their own star-like qualities, so they receive warmth (in the form of insight) from the star. Eventually, with work, planets can become stars, and warm others who need it.
So the key is to shine upon those who benefit from the warmth, and to exchange the water of emotional vulnerability with those who are invested in giving and receiving. To do otherwise is an underutilization of our energy, and will not contribute to our personal evolution, or the evolution of humanity.
Peace,
Chris
Get 5 Free Minutes ~ Live Psychic and Tarot Readings
Get 10 Minutes for $1.99 ~ Live Psychic and Tarot Readers
This blogger is supported by ethical reading sites which offer live online psychic readings, tarot readers and astrology.
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